Half marathon!!

I was still pregnant with Logan when I set a goal to do a half marathon before the year was up. Wahoo I did it! It was way hard starting from nothing again after giving birth. I ran slowly all summer, sorta depressed cause I couldn’t get up to my normal pace. I had weird post-baby pains that came and went. My running schedule coordinated around a nursing baby. I put off signing up for the half cause I was like do I really want to try and do this so soon??? But I signed up. It was official.

I trained up to 12 miles and finishing that run I was like geez I am looking at a 2:40 half!! Can I be happy with that? No, but I will be happy that I completed my goal. Right.

Well Saturday was race day! It was in Logan so I got up at 3:50 AM (ouch!!!!!) and rode up with my mom and brother. I was nervous and excited. I thought I might throw up. Mostly cause my brother was eating macaroni and cheese. I KNOW!!

We arrived at the bus pick-up around 5:30 and they went to grab their race packets. They got mine for me. Cause guess what I was doing. Pumping in the car. In the dark. Praying no one could see in.

It was strange.

Hey you do what you have to do.

Then we were off on one of the buses. I couldn’t believe the crowds, there were around 2000 racers. I was thinking, okay. Here we go. I will just do the best I can. I know I can do it. Time does NOT matter.

The race was supposed to start at 7 but got started 20 minutes late. I was SO anxious I’m like let’s GO the clock is ticking. I was SO pumped up!! ...Literally. Like, start on time already cause I pumped at 5:30 for a reason. Sorry, but this is how it is.

FINALLY WE WERE OFF! It is SOOOOO exciting and such a rush. You’re in a sea of runners, all of us wondering how we’re gonna do, hoping we can make it, finding our pace. Bryce shot off like a rocket and I stayed with my mom... yeah for like a mile. I didn’t want to burn myself out trying to keep her pace and definitely didn't want to hold her back. So I ran the race by myself. It’s not so bad, I had a lot of fun observing and listening to all the runners around me. You get to know people, sort of, because the same few runners were with me almost the whole way. They'd pass me, then I’d pass them, back and forth. I thought of them as my running buddies even though we never spoke. I heard people talk about their families, their aches and pains, their old wild days, movies, sports. You’re alone but not alone. I would pick certain people to follow, I'd say in my mind "okay you are carrying me through this point." I honestly enjoyed every minute. I didn’t experience any horrible pain. The canyon is just GORGEOUS, and the downhill was AWESOME. Plus the wind was at my back, pushing me. It is such a great course.

I had no idea what the time was. I had no idea how I was doing. I mean, I felt consistent, and I just kept saying, if I am under 2:30, in the 2:20’s, I would feel good about myself. So after mile 12 when I heard someone say we were just after the 10, I was like, wait, they cannot mean 2:10. Then I entered the straightaway... I LOVE this part, everyone is cheering and I get chills and a burst of energy every time. I was like WHERE IS THE CLOCK?! Then I saw 2:19 and I was like no WAY!!!! What a pleasant surprise. My official chip time ended up being 2:17, beating my time from last year’s Ogden half by 6 minutes. SERIOUSLY! I was so happy. Nate and the kids were there waiting for me, my mom was right there at the finish, she’d gotten in only 2 minutes ahead of me. And there was Nate’s sister Kellie and her husband Ryan who both PR’d they did amazing. My brother Bryce did it in 1:53, that mac & cheese really worked for him.

It’s funny, you start off: what am I doing, CAN I DO THIS? And then at the end: what am I going to do NEXT!! It’s the best feeling. I mean I don’t think I’ll ever be a fast runner, I’ll probably never be in the front of the pack! But I don’t do it to place. I do it because years ago I never EVER would have thought I’d be a runner and could go so many miles. It's rewarding to set a goal and accomplish it. I mean, I wouldn't cry if I got faster... but it's enough to make it to the finish and feel so alive. Sore, but alive.

Here we are before the race, trying to feel confident!


I made it! I look disgusting but here are pictures anyway.






No medals for this race... just dog tags! Logan liked it though.


So I've been wondering: what is next for me???? Hmmmm... definitely another half... but the real question is, do I want to do a fifth 26.2 marathon? It's been four and a half years and 3 kids since I've done a full. At this point I can't imagine it, it seems crazy. But I have to say it's in the back of my mind...

I'm a big kid now!

Today I became a big girl. The tires on my car have been dangerously low. So low that as I headed off to my mom’s today I feared for my life. And so I bit the bullet and decided I am a grown woman I can put air in my own tires. Nate gave me this lesson a while ago, come on, how hard could it be on my own.

I pulled into a gas station, put in my quarters (paying for air. Whose idea was THAT?) and proceeded to spend the next couple minutes DEFLATING my tire.

Okay maybe I didn’t know what I was doing.

It did NOT help that some old dude filling his motorcycle at the gas pump right next to me was observing my every move.

So I put in more quarters and tried the next tire, this time pushing the lever… oh THAT’S HOW IT WORKS!! Whew, now hurry hurry do the next tire before my time runs out…oh the PRESSURE! I’d parked a little too far so there I am hauling that cord all the way around my car, thinking there is no way it is going to reach. It did, barely. But it was like trying to keep measuring tape from snapping back into itself. It was terrifying. Yup motorcycle dude still watching. Get a life, creep. I finally get all coordinated and it turns off. ARGH!!! Those things are RIDICULOUS! Seriously a rip-off. I gave up and went to my mom’s with half the tires partly done. My mom told me about some FREE AIR! so on my way home I was like here we go again. So after trying to turn it on for 5 minutes, then realizing it WAS on (So gimme a break have YOU filled up YOUR own tires? It can be tricky! All right or maybe I am super slow, whatever!) it filled up my tires in like 3 seconds. That is what it’s all about. Oh yeah. Go me. I am such an independent, strong, woman for filling up my own tires.

In other news.

Forget the treadmill…

Can I please please please order an adult-size Exer-saucer? Party in a seat!!!!

Catch-up...

There was a huge crowd waiting for their missionaries at the airport Tuesday night. Everyone was so anxious. A couple men in suits came down the escalator and everyone started to cheer... till we noticed they didn't have name tags, whoops. Where the heck were they we've been waiting for forever!! And then... ta-da!! A load of cute missionaries!! I got chills.


It was awesome. WELCOME HOME BROTHER!!!!!






We missed you Bryce. You were an awesome missionary.

Awhile ago I tried in vain to get a good picture of my kids all dressed up in their BYU outfits from Nate's mom. It was hard. Oh well. Here they are anyway. Obviously my favorite is the one at the top of my blog.




So Jenna and Carter were doing a pretty poor job of holding Logan. So my mom volunteered to hide under a blanket and balance him. We are so clever.





I love how in that last one Carter and Logan look like they've been havin a GOOOOOD time. Makes me laugh!

Okay let's try something new... cause I think grandma is suffocating under that blanket. What sacrifice. Okay, everyone on their bellies!



Hmmm Logan is way too interested in the grass. Yum yum.

Okay new pose. I know grandma's hands are in the picture but I am desperate.



Carter is getting grouchy.

Okay... let's try individual pics. Go Jenna, you like to pose! Go Cougars!




No smiles from this dude.



"Carter, your turn!"


I am just not quick enough.

Whew. Trying to be a photographer is tough.

Nate and Erika: The Songs of our Lives

A song came on the radio today that totally brought me back to The History That Is Nate and Erika. And I started thinking of all the songs that played a part in our soap operatic past. Wanna hear them? Even though I've probably beat to death the subject of our past? You’re bored anyway, why not!

First song up:

“The Boy is Mine” by Monica and Brandy

I was 15 and my friends and I were at a church dance trying to decide what songs could be the themes of our love lives. THIS SONG was mine. Why? Cause I had a secret crush on Nate… and so did another one of my friends. Everyone knew SHE liked him, but I didn’t tell her I did too because I didn’t want to compete with her for Nate. (RING A BELL KRISTY? So glad we can laugh about this now!) So instead I drove myself absolutely insane watching her flirt with him while he flirted back, all the while denying to everyone my true feelings for Nate. I was an angry woman. I was so desperate for Nate to like ME and not HER that in my mind I was totally like, BRING. IT. ON. Or in other words… “The boy is MINE!”

Here are those lyrics.

“You need to give it up
Had about enough
It's not hard to see
The boy is mine
I'm sorry that you
seem to be confused
He belongs to me
The boy is mine.”

Um, another suggestion from my friends for the theme of my love life with Nate during this time?

“Push” by Matchbox 20

“I wanna push you around, well I will, well I will…”

I promise I never would have REALLY pushed you, Kristy.

Moving forward in our confusing, dramatic history…

Nate and I went to my junior prom and had a HUGE talk after. You know the talk. The TORT. The Terms of the Relationship Talk. This was his second time telling me he wanted to be more than friends. This was the second time I told him NO I only saw him as a really good friend. Ouch, right? Okay you're thinking, wait, didn't she just say she had a huge crush on him?

I know. I didn't get it either. I didn't understand why I couldn't see him romantically because he WAS everything I wanted. I adored him. I loved him to death. I just got scared thinking about holding his hand. I told him I wanted to stay friends if we could because I needed him in my life.

Despite breaking his heart (and he admits that I did!! Poor hubby.) we did stay friends and a few days after that talk Nate and I were in my car and THIS song came on the radio.

“Everything You Want” by Vertical Horizon

The lyrics?

“He's everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you
And you don't know why”

Nate says to me, “Wow this song reminds me of you.”

I say, “What do you mean?”

He says, “Just think about it.”

Yeah I think I understood what he meant...

So there we were, just great, wonderful friends.

Then Nate gets a girlfriend. Feelings I was NOT planning on take over my heart. I was SO freaking jealous. It was ridiculous. I started daydreaming of kissing him, I wanted him so much I could have killed myself for ruining my chances with him. During this time ALL these songs reminded me of Nate.

“You Already Won Me Over” by Alanis Morissette

It goes:

“You're the best listener that I've ever met
You're my best friend
Best friend with benefits
What took me so long

You've already won me over in spite of me
Don't be alarmed if I fall head over feet
Don't be surprised if I love you for all that you are
I couldn't help it
It's all your fault”

And this NEXT song described it to a tee… because yeah one huge reason I’d told Nate NO twice was cause I was afraid of ruining our friendship.

“Can’t Fight This Feeling” by REO Speedwagon

“I can’t fight this feeling any longer
And yet I’m still afraid to let it flow
What started out as friendship, has grown stronger
I only wish I had the strength to let it show

I tell myself that I can’t hold out forever
I said there is no reason for my fear
Cause I feel so secure when we’re together
You give my life direction
You make everything so clear

And even as I wander
I’m keeping you in sight
You’re a candle in the window
On a cold, dark winters night
And I’m getting closer than I ever thought I might

And I can’t fight this feeling anymore
I’ve forgotten what I started fighting for
It’s time to bring this ship into the shore
And throw away the oars, forever.”

Then, I remember THIS song came on the radio (I was listening to oldies?) and I pushed record on my cassette player (wow that sounds ancient) thinking THIS IS EXACTLY ME.

“Foolish Little Girl” by The Shirelles

Here are the lyrics.

“You broke his heart and made him cry,
And he's been blue since then. Now he's
Found somebody new and you want him
back again.

Foolish little girl, fickle little girl
You didn't want him when he wanted you
He's found another love, it's her he's dreaming of
And there's not a single thing that you can do”

Believe me I knew I made a big mistake. I wanted to go back to being the woman in Nate’s life.

Well summer started and I was desperate for a summer fling. Ask any of my friends. It was my #1 goal that summer. Pretty dignified, eh. Well guess what I got one. That whole summer I dated a guy and Nate dated his girlfriend (who was actually the nicest, sweetest girl. I’m not just sayin that cause she's on my blog list, it’s TRUE!) Then I noticed I had way more fun with Nate than with my so-called boyfriend. As the beginning of my senior year started, both our relationships ended. And we FINALLY ended up together!! Nate told me this song reminded me of him:

“Crazy For This Girl” by Evan and Jaron. Awww. Self-explanatory.

And then this song ALWAYS brings back all those feelings from that time.

“Hanging By a Moment” by Lifehouse

The lyrics:

“I'm falling even more in love with you
Letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with you
I'm living for the only thing I know
I'm running and not quite sure where to go
And I don't know what I'm diving into
Just hanging by a moment here with you”

Not only did the “falling even more in love with you” line perfectly describe how we felt for each other, but so did the “hanging by a moment” line, because we both knew he was going to go on a mission in the near future, and only one thing was for certain: we had each other, right then, for that moment. I wanted to hang onto "us" as much as I could because I didn’t know what was going to happen! We dated for around 10 months before his mission. Then he left. The night we said good-bye we stood on his porch. He had been set-apart so we’d done our hugging and kissing earlier. So all we could do is just stand there and shake hands and say good-bye for two years. I was perfectly aware he wanted me to wait for him… and I knew I wanted nothing more than for us to get married when he got home. But we both knew with me dating and going up to BYU-Idaho that it may not happen. My heart broke as I said good-bye and turned away to walk to my car. I started bawling, and the first words I heard on the radio when I turned on my car were these:

“Come stop your crying
It will be all right…”

Uh yeah that didn’t help. Especially as the song continued!

“'Cause you'll be in my heart
Yes, you'll be in my heart
From this day on
Now and forever more.”

Phil Collins, why did you do that to me!

So he left. While he was gone these songs were my theme songs!

“If You Wait For Me” by Tracy Chapman

“I Miss You” by Incubus

Pretty much every sappy song.

I know having a “missionary” is not for everyone… but I would not change a thing, he served an awesome mission and it was a great time in both of our lives. And to everyone who told me it WOULDN’T WORK…

It did!

No awkwardness at all when he got home.

I mean, I guess no awkwardness, he kissed me 10 minutes after he was released.

And our song now?? Hmmm…

“We Are a Happy Family”??

Founder's Day!

Last Saturday my mom told me to come to the Founder's Day fair cause she had to help run the duck pond. So I took the kids and it was SO much fun!! And guess what, they had FREE popsicles!



And FREE cotton candy (something if you kept feeding me I'd eat all day.)





FREE duck pond and fishing pond. Jenna and Carter scored a ring pop, Cinderella ring, DVD of cartoons, Winnie-the-Pooh flashcards and bubbles.



Free face-painting!



Oh let's not forget the free train ride!





And of course the playground.




I was holding Logan while pushing Jenna and Carter, the swings were making him giggle.


My dad was having fun, too.






Ah, free fun.

So while I'm posting pictures, here's a question for you. What can you make with a roll of toilet paper, a flashlight, and a pair of panties?


I'm not sure. But Jenna hasn't let anyone touch it for 4 days.